a rat or a horse

why does the image of myself

depend so much on others?

do I need an ‘impartial’ judge?

do I need a judge?

I clearly do.

you cannot win if there’s no race.

but, why win?

it didn’t make me happy before.

it made me numb.

it’s stress up to the race,

then it’s the race,

which doesn’t feel like much

- adrenaline maybe?

and then it’s this small gap,

between the end of the race

and the beginning of a new one,

where maybe,

sometimes,

I breathe.

I need to breathe more.

______

a rat or a horse by Dimitrios Kokkinos is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License